I have been neglecting my blog for a long time and am back for good after 2 years +.
I decided to login to my blog after 2 years+ (surprisingly, I still remember my password) and found a couple of drafted posts that I didn't publish (mostly are from 2013 onwards. Most of the posts were incomplete as I didn't really finish the entire story but what I know is that from 2013 onwards was all about rantings and my honest feelings). My blog was my best friend back then, and a space where I can totally be who I am without having the fear of getting judged in some people's eyes.
Anyway, what makes me come back after 2 years +? I don't know. I felt that something tells me to do so because blogging used to be my passion since high school (I deleted my first blog in high school because it was too cringy and decided to delete it so nobody finds my blog and mock me hahahahh) And so glad that I didn't actually delete this blog (I wanted to 2 years + ago due to certain reasons) but hey, this blog is still around and looks like I'll continue to blog after 2 years + hahahahah
It's coming to the end of 2019. I realize that I didn't post anything in 2018 because well honestly, 2018 was a tough year for me and there's no point looking back since it is the past. Long story short, 2018 made me stronger and carry forward to 2019, I became the strongest of the strongest (actually I'm still very soft at heart) hahahaha but jokes aside, 2018 made me who I am today in 2019.
However, 2019 has been better (maybe cause I went through a tough battle last year and that I finally know how to guard myself better) - what I notice about 2019 is that - I reconnect with most of my old friends, met some familiar faces that I know but didn't talk - and eventually we talk and became friends, prioritizing the ones that love and support me (that small quality of friends that became my family), and most importantly, being able to let go and be happy for the ones that I've crossed path with but no longer in talking terms due to certain reasons as well. Praying does help a lot and I secretly pray for the ones that I'm no longer in talking terms with to be happy and secretly wish that they will succeed in life - being able to hit as many milestones in life, creating better friendships and relationships. 2019 also taught me to love thy enemies because honestly, we are not perfect and some things happen for a reason. 2019 is also a year where I found out the truth that I needed to know. Painful but at least it is the truth that I deserve to know and that it allows me to grow as an individual.
So basically 2018 taught me to try because no matter what, I did tried in whatsoever circumstances that happened, and the truth that I needed to know instead of words but actions.
& 2019 - healing - and accepting the fact that we can't change the past - of why some things happened alas, acceptance and letting go.
2019 is indeed a fruitful year (will jot it down on my next post cause it is 1.57am and I'm tired), got a bus-ride to catch later as I'll be watching Air Supply tonight (yayyyy) okay will save it for the next post byeeeeee :D
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